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After, I’m skippin’ back to the ship, lighter in the wallet but floatin’—so happy I could cry! Surprised me how chill she was, like she’s seen a thousand mes. Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe she’s the queen of the docks, ruler of all prossies! In my head, I’m plannin’—next port, I’m findin’ her again. “The Social Network” vibes hit hard—“I’m CEO, b*tch!”—‘cept I’m just a sailor with a boner and a dream. HA-HA-HA! Moral? Ports got perks, doll—find a prostitute, live a little!

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Finally, we get back inside, and I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s get back to work.” But nope! The printer jams. Again. I swear, that thing has it out for me. I’m wrestling with it, and my coworker, Aisha, walks by and says, “You know, it’s not a wrestling match, right?” Thanks, Aisha. Real helpful.

Omadhoo beats Thimarafushi, goes to semifinals